Sorry, Rousseau

You might have missed this in this post, but if you were paying attention, you saw that I have left these sentiments behind and gotten a smartphone, for the first time ever. My apologies to Jean-Jacques Rousseau.

Here are some thoughts on smartphone ownership after having had one for almost two months:

• One of the biggest reasons I decided to get one was for the MBTA apps, so that I know when the bus is coming. I don't have a car, so when I'm not near a T station, I'd like to know how much longer I have to wait in the cold/rain/heat until a bus comes to rescue me. OpenMBTA is pretty great, especially if I decide to take one bus that runs very close to my house. Unfortunately, it's not a magic app- it can tell me when the bus is coming but doesn't make it come any faster.

• Instagram is overrated. I was excited to check it out after hearing so much about it, but I was very underwhelmed. Most of the pictures on it end up on Facebook anyway, and the filters really aren't that big a deal. 

• Soundhound is better than Shazam. I feel like Shazam is the brand name people go to when they're talking about using an app to find out what a song is, but Soundhound does everything Shazam does but does it better. It also gets everything I sing into it, even the obscure stuff, while Shazam doesn't. 

• I love having the whole Internet at my disposal- if I'm out somewhere and want to show a friend Mark Wahlberg Talks to Animals, I just pull it up. However, it's no substitute for a real computer and a bigger screen. 

• It's great to discover apps for things you wouldn't even have thought of. I just ordered Domino's and did it all through the Domino's app. 

• Talk-to-text makes no sense to me. You might as well just make a phone call. And on that note,

• I refuse to talk to Siri. She scares the shit out of me.

Odds and Ends

Life goes on, and this week has been blessedly mundane. Here are five completely unrelated things.

1. THANK YOU to everyone who has donated so far to my run next week! If you haven't donated yet, you have until Monday at 5:00 PM.

2. While I still don't like Twitter, I have to say that one of the best feeds out there is Modern Seinfeld. I love Seinfeld and reference it way too much, and Modern Seinfeld cracks me up. The hypothetical plots they come up with are things I can completely see the Seinfeld characters doing. It is kind of strange to think about how much exists now that didn't in the 90s- the Internet was barely a thing and cell phones were still new when the show ended.

But anyway, the other day they had their best tweet yet:

Elaine hates Arrested Development. Everyone judges her like she killed someone. J:"There are some things you're just not allowed to say."
— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) April 23, 2013

AMAZING. Even more amazing considering that my post on that subject was titled "Call Me Elaine," in reference to the episode where Elaine hates The English Patient. I can tell you from experience that people really do act like you killed someone if you say you hate Arrested Development!

3. Line from Seinfeld I keep wanting to quote but can never find the right opportunity for: "You know, we're living in a SOCIETY!"

Line from Friends I keep wanting to quote but can never find the right opportunity for: "That is brand new information!"




4. On Sundays, I am now DVR-ing two shows, which are at polar opposites of the current spectrum of modern TV: Mad Men and What Would Ryan Lochte Do?.

Mad Men is still, in my humble opinion, the best show on TV. Even now, in Season 6, I'm marveling at how literary it is. I always tell people it's a show for English majors- there is just so much to analyze and examine, both in individual episodes and across seasons and the whole show.

And then there's What Would Ryan Lochte Do?.

Ryan Lochte cracks me up. He's so pretty, and such a talented swimmer, but apparently there's some chlorine water stuck in his brain because man, is he dumb. Male swimmers are usually huge dorks with great bodies, but most of them are somewhat smart. Not Ryan.




There's only been one episode, but so far, while he's definitely quite dim, he also comes off as very sweet, kind of like if Joey Tribbiani was a swimmer. Reality TV is often scripted (shocker!) but I did believe him when he said he just wants a girl to settle down with, and there was a really nice moment where he got teary talking about how his family always supports him.

I have to say, too, that the show is making me think of other shows featuring people who presented themselves as dumb. In 2006, Pink had that song "Stupid Girls" that called out celebrities like Jessica Simpson and Paris Hilton for dumbing themselves down. More recently, we had Snooki on Jersey Shore playing up the dumb factor, and one reason among many I was glad when Sarah Palin did not ascend to higher office was because I dreaded how her lack of intelligence, and seeming indifference to her ignorance, would reflect on women everywhere.

It would be awesome if we could live in a world where women didn't feel like the best way to attract attention is by being pretty and dumb. That would be ideal, but instead we now have this show, where a guy is building his image around being pretty and dumb.

Uh, yea equality?

5. There's a shortage of platelets available for donation now due to the bombing last week, so consider making an appointment to donate platelets!

How to Live Through a Week of Tragedy

You can’t remember so many bad things ever happening in such a short amount of time. Information keeps coming in about the bombing at the marathon and the people who were killed and wounded. All of your friends who were at the marathon (it is not an exaggeration to say that EVERYONE in Boston knows someone who was there) are uninjured, but the stories of people who were hurt are hard to hear. You remember how when events with mass casualties happened in the past, you tried to think of who you knew who could have been hurt—on September 11^th, your cousin who often flew from Boston to LA, and when the shooting in Arizona happened, your friend who lived in Tucson. You had to wait to hear if those people were okay.

Now it’s your turn. You’re the one people are trying to get in touch with to make sure you’re okay. You’re the one getting texts from your parents, sister, aunts, cousins, friend who’s on vacation, friend in Seattle, friend in DC. It’s not some distant event that you’re mildly disturbed by and think about occasionally—it’s here. It’s your city, your people.

And despite the acts of kindness that are reassuring you of the goodness of people out there, this week of tragedy keeps getting worse. Poisoned letters are sent to President Obama and a Mississippi senator. A plant explodes in Texas, killing and injuring dozens of people. The bill for background checks on guns fails in the Senate, which makes you so angry you’re afraid to talk about it for fear of saying something you’ll regret. Something else in your own world that you don’t want to talk about publicly—something not on par with everything else but still pretty awful— also happens this week.

You don’t think things could get worse…and then they do.

*             *             *

Before you go to bed Thursday night, you hear that an MIT police officer has been shot, then that he was killed. You’ve seen the photos the FBI released of the two suspects and note that there’s nothing distinctive about either of them—they could be anyone. You wonder, before you go to bed, if this shooting is related to the bombings or if it’s yet another unrelated tragedy in a terrible week.

Friday morning, when you finally drag yourself out of bed after hitting snooze several times and start to get dressed, it occurs to you to check the news and see what the latest is on the bombing suspects, so you pick up your new iPhone.

You don’t make it to the news. Your phone has blown up with text messages and voicemails almost as numerous as they were on Monday after the bombing. Dazed, you check the computer and try to make sense out of the hell that’s broken loose while you were asleep. Your office is closed. The T has shut down. Cambridge is one of several cities and towns on lockdown. You’re not supposed to leave the house.

You stumble downstairs and turn on the TV, bringing your laptop with you and trying to get yourself up to speed. They think the suspect is in Watertown, not very close to you, but who really knows? You see pictures the news crew has from around the city. Boston, on a workday when people are normally rushing around and doing their day-to-day thing, looks post-apocalyptic. This, oddly, is just as scary as anything else.

Your fright turns to impatience when you realize that it might be awhile before they catch the guy. The news starts repeating the same things they’ve already said. You go to the back porch to read the paper. You answer work emails from your customers, who all live out of state and have probably forgotten where you live. You talk to your parents, who are flying home from their vacation in Florida. You have a long chain of text messages going with three friends, and your discussion of the news coverage is interspersed with talk of guys, one friend’s cat, and the Geek Squad at Best Buy. You get annoyed when you realize that you barely have any food in the house and can’t even order takeout because businesses are all closed. You get more annoyed when you realize what a nice day it is and how great it would be for running but you’re now stuck inside because of some murderous assholes. Then you feel guilty for being so annoyed at little inconveniences when everyone you know survived the bombing unscathed and so many other people can’t say that.

Around 6:30 they hold a news conference where they tell people the lockdown is over but the suspect has not yet been apprehended. You’re still nervous but dying to get out of the house, and since the T’s running again, you and your friends start making plans for drinks and dessert. As you’re getting ready to go out, you see something happening on the TV. It’s clear now that they’ve found the guy, and you and your friends immediately postpone your plans. You keep texting each other new things that you hear. You keep on watching until finally it’s over and the suspect is captured.

On Saturday, you get up, get dressed, and head out for the plans you didn’t get to last night. You drink multiple glasses of wine at lunch and buy cupcakes from a bakery. You and your friends head into the city and see the makeshift memorial set up on Boylston Street. Several blocks are still shut down. There are some adorable therapy dogs over by the memorial that you and your friends pet. The dogs look tired—like everyone else, they’ve had a long week.

Saturday night you sleep for twelve hours straight. 

*             *             *

So much goes through your mind this week. While you don’t know any victims personally, little connections keep startling you. Jeff Bauman is from your hometown and was two years behind you at your high school. Patrick Downes graduated from BC a year ahead of you, and many of your friends know him. Sean Collier lived near you, on a street your roommate walks the dog down every day. They’re jolting details, but you have to keep reminding yourself that it wouldn’t be any less tragic if it had happened to people who come from some place you’ve never heard of. You know it will be hard to remember this the next time something tragic happens somewhere that’s not here.

You try to piece together the bits of information you keep hearing about these two brothers, everything their friends and relatives say, trying to make sense of what could have led them to do this before ultimately concluding that you never will, because dropping bombs on a crowd of people at a marathon will never make any sense.

Humor is one of the only things keeping you sane. You’ve always liked The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, but you usually only tune in after some kind of major current event, like to see what Jon Stewart has to say about the presidential election. But this week, watching Comedy Central is getting you through the day. And aside from every other awesome thing they do this week, their Boston tributes are especially gratifying. This clip from Colbert manages to be hilarious while also getting Boston exactly right.  

You feel profound gratitude for everyone who helped put an end to the manhunt that dominated Friday. You’re horrified when you think about the guy who found the suspect hiding in his boat and how scary that must have been.

You wonder how long it will be before Hollywood makes a movie out of all this.

You stop talking in the second person.

                                                    *             *             *

There are so many ways a person can use the word “love,” so I need to get across what I mean when I say I love Boston. A lot of people say they love their hometown but still roll their eyes at it, as if their love is like the love they’d have for a parent who means well but doesn’t understand them at all, like Emily on Gilmore Girls. But Boston, for me, is not Emily Gilmore—it’s Lorelai Gilmore, the mom you can’t believe you were lucky enough to be born to. Boston may have been the city I fell into because it’s so close to where I grew up, but that’s not why I stay here. I stay here because there’s no city in the world I could ever love more.

I love that it’s full of colleges and therefore full of people who are here for education, people who are intelligent, people with ambition, people who want to go on to do great things. I love that it’s so easy to get around on foot. I love the passion people have for sports teams—one of my fondest memories of college was watching the whole city erupt in happiness after the Sox won the World Series for the first time in eighty-six years. I love that people who are liberal and open-minded are the rule rather than the exception here. I love that so many big moments in American history occurred here. I love that so many funny people grew up here—Amy Poehler, Steve Carell, Conan O’Brien, Mindy Kaling, just to name a few. I love that Boston inspired movies like Good Will Hunting and The Departed. I love that we have good seafood. I love walking down Newbury Street, getting a cannoli in the North End, taking a ferry to the Boston Harbor Islands, spending an afternoon at the Museum of Science or the Aquarium or the MFA. I love that we have independent bookstores and artsy little movie theaters. I love that it’s not far from the ocean or the mountains. I love that you don’t need a car to live here. I love that we have four distinct seasons, unlike so many other parts of the country. I love that it’s such a foodie city that I feel like my list of restaurants to try will never end. I love the view as I’m going over the river on the Red Line. I love the Boston Globe. I love that the local furniture companies keep trying to outdo each other with their TV commercials. I love that our medical care is among the best in the world—I know multiple people who might not have survived some scary health issues if not for the excellent medical care they received here. I love that the people here respect each other’s space but won’t hesitate to help someone in need—a quality on display in all its glory this week.

“This is our fucking city,” Big Papi so eloquently put it at the Sox game on Saturday. And it’s MY fucking city, too. I have no desire to live anywhere but the Boston area for the rest of my life, and it’s too bad it took a week of tragedy to remind me why. 

A Plea for Help

I don’t normally do this kind of thing- I likely never will again- but Internet, I need your help.

On May 4, I will be running in this 9K race: the Red Sox Runto Home Base. It supports the Home Base Foundation, which raises money for veterans with traumatic brain injury and post-traumatic stress disorder. It also supports the development of new treatments for TBI and PTSD and works to lessen the stigma of seeking treatment for these conditions. You can find out more about the Home Base Foundation here: 

http://www.runtohomebase.org/what-is-the-home-base-program

This is a great cause that I hope you will consider supporting. Consider this:

• An estimated 30% of veterans from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan suffer from TBI and/or PTSD.
• In New England alone, it affects an estimated 50,000 veterans.
• Less than 50% of veterans seek care for these conditions, often due to the aforementioned stigma.
• A number of treatments have been proven to be very effective at treating TBI and/or PTSD.
• Lack of treatment is disruptive to the lives of both veterans and their families.
• The majority of homeless veterans of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars have PTSD.

This is an organization that’s doing a lot of great things to help veterans and their families, and I think we can all agree that no one should have to suffer from the pain of TBI and PTSD. 

I must raise $1,000 by 5 PM on April 29, 2013.

As of today, April 15, I’ve raised $120.

Here is the link through which you can donate.

You can also donate by check- information here.

Please help me make this goal! You don’t need to be a veteran, or be related to a veteran, or know a veteran, or know me, for that matter. Every little bit counts, and every little bit is going to help relieve someone’s suffering.

Thank you in advance, from the bottom of my heart.

For Boston

It hasn’t really sunk in yet that the bombing all over the news and the pictures that look like a war zone are from something that happened here, in my city, at a race that many people I know were running or watching and that I’ve attended myself multiple times. My friends, as far as I know, are all unharmed, but many other people can’t say the same.

I grew up watching the Boston Marathon. Marathon Monday is always on Patriots Day, a holiday commemorating the start of the American Revolution that falls on the third Monday of April and is only celebrated in Massachusetts and Maine. (My dad, a native of Lexington, where the Revolution started, thought Patriots Day was second to Christmas when he was growing up. He wants it to be a national holiday, but this was definitely not the way we’d prefer for the rest of the country to find out about it.) It’s always during school vacation, since Massachusetts public schools get the week of Patriots Day off. In college, we always had the day off because BC is at Mile 21 of the marathon, and people would start drinking early, put on their summer clothes, and cheer on their friends who were running, many of whom were running it for BC’s Campus School. My first two years out of college, I lived just about at the top of Heartbreak Hill, and I could see the runners going by from my bedroom window. My sister ran for the Campus School a few years ago, and my parents and aunt and I went to watch her at the finish line.

I tell you all this just to get across that everyone in the Boston area has some kind of association with the Boston Marathon—these are just mine. It’s a huge part of living here. Every Bostonian who wasn’t on the marathon route today knew someone who was. It’s not only a state holiday but it’s a day that’s supposed to be fun, joyous, and full of personal triumph, and a day we share with runners and their families from around the world.

I can’t begin to imagine the horror that the victims and their families are going through right now or how awful it must have been to be there when the explosions happened. And I think it might actually be worse for Bostonians who aren’t in Boston right now—like I said, it’s school vacation week, so a lot of people are on vacation, including my parents.

Bostonians can sometimes get a bad rap, for reasons that are somewhat deserved—we’re reserved and unfriendly, our sports fans are obnoxious, we put lawn chairs in parking spaces after snowstorms and then fight over them. But the silver lining of tragedies like this one is that they bring out thebest in people, and I am really heartened by the stories I’ve heard about people rushing to help at the scene, running right from the finish line to donate blood, and offering housing to runners who, due to the crime scene being sorted out, no longer have a place to stay. (They’re now saying they have enough blood donations, but that it would help to have more donors in coming weeks, so consider doing that!)

Right now, we don’t know who did this or why. We do know that the response was swift and that, as President Obama said today, “Boston is a tough and resilient town. So are its people.”

I’ve never lived anywhere but the Boston area and I never will. I have so much love for this city—and despite our reputation, today proved that there’s also plenty of love in this city.

Pray for the victims and for the city, everyone. 

The Katie-Has-Bad-Taste Post

I’m about to tell you some of my unpopular opinions, but I have a feeling this isn’t one of them: I hate icebreakers. You know, those let’s-go-around-the-room-and-get-to-know-each-other exercises that people do at the beginning of a meeting or event. But if you must do an icebreaker, here are two that are actually kind of interesting to think about: things you like that no one else seems to, and things you don’t like that everyone else does.

You guys, if you’ve been paying attention, already know some of my likes and dislikes in both categories. I love Celine Dion. I hate Arrested Development. And here’s where I give you a multitude of other reasons to think less of me.

Things I Like That No One Else Does

Domino’s Pizza

So apparently, it’s a commonly accepted opinion that Domino’s sucks. I…don’t know why. I really like Domino’s. It’s actually my favorite of the big pizza chains. Their cheesy bread is amazing.

Seafood

With all my weird food quirks, which I’ll get to in “Things I Hate that No One Else Does,” I do love seafood. And because I’m from New England, my standards for seafood are high.

Facebook

It’s become trendy lately to say that you hate Facebook and love Twitter. I’m the complete opposite. I still really love Facebook. Sure, some people are annoying on it, but there’s nothing else that lets me keep up-to-date on people. And someone as nosy as me really needs that kind of tool. Hiding people on your newsfeed solves most Facebook problems anyway. I have an acquaintance who’s a fan of the Tea Party, and while I have her blocked on my newsfeed, every once in awhile I’ll check to see what crazy, conservative, teabagger, “Poor people are lazy and selfish but I love Jesus!” thing she’s posted on her wall today. And you know what? I like looking at pictures of people’s babies. Babies are cute. 

I do draw the line at gushing over your significant other, though. Don’t do that.

The Da Vinci Code

Like, not love. I liked The Da Vinci Code, as in I read it once and found it enjoyable and saw the movie when it came out. It’s nowhere near a favorite. But I will defend it because I don’t think it deserves any bit of the backlash it’s gotten over the years. No, it’s not the best-written book in the world. Yes, it’s sometimes overly dramatic and far-fetched.  Yes, there are some factual inaccuracies. But it’s not as if this was intended to be some kind of award-winning masterpiece. It’s just a thriller. It’s unusual in that it’s a thriller about religion and art, and that it became such a blockbuster hit, but it’s still just a thriller. Plus, considering how little people read nowadays, I’m not terribly picky about which specific books are keeping the publishing industry going. I have no desire to read Twilight or Fifty Shades of Grey, but if you want to buy them, go for it.

Megan Fox

Not as an actress, mind you. I’ve only heard bad things about her acting, but never having seen any of her movies, I can neither confirm nor deny that. However, her interviews are awesome. She just so clearly does not give a shit about what anyone thinks. She knows exactly what her image is and what people think of her, and a lot of times she makes good points. This comment she made on young celebrities who had private pictures leaked to the Internet was great, and something I wish more people would say publicly.

Cheap Light Beer

Not only do I like Bud Light and Miller Light, I like them better than what most people consider “good” beer. And if I enjoy the taste of something with fewer calories, why the hell wouldn’t I drink it?

Phone Calls

Hating phone calls is a thing with our generation, but not with me. I hate texting for anything more complicated than, “I’m here. Where are you?” And for my friends who live out of town, I’d much rather catch up with them over the phone. Not to mention that phone calls are a huge part of my job- I’d be kind of screwed if I hated the phone.

Things I HateThat No One Else Does

Twitter

I still don’t like Twitter. And not for lack of trying, believe me.

Concerts

I love music. I do not, for the most part, love concerts. The forest, for me, is not usually visible amid the trees. If they’re in small venues, you have to stand, and I hate standing. You have to wait through crappy opening bands. You never know whether to sing along or dance or what and try to figure out what looks the least awkward. Your hearing is shot when it’s over, and most of the time you end up thinking the artist sounds better on the CD. These days, it would take a pretty amazing concert for me to pay money for a ticket.

Tom Brady

This is blasphemous in New England (probably not so much in other parts of the country), but I can’t stand this guy. It started with the whole dumping-pregnant-girlfriend-for-a-supermodel thing, and it seems like ever since then, everything he’s done has just been irritating. He comes off as smug and faux-gracious in interviews, the same reason so many people criticize Anne Hathaway. He had that awful grown-out hair for awhile. He’s a spokesman for Uggs. Fucking Uggs. Yes, he is a great quarterback, undeniably. He just bugs the hell out of me as a person.

Kathy Griffin

Now, she annoys me on absolutely every level. I’m honestly kind of mystified at how popular she is. I’ve never found one word out of her mouth remotely funny, and she has that awful voice.

Spinning

I like yoga, Zumba, boot camp, pilates, etc. But I absolutely loathed spinning when I tried it. I didn’t even get that I-just-got-a-great-workout feeling when it was over—I was just sore and miserable. I hear so many people talk about how great spin class is, and for the life of me I can’t figure out why.

Stand-Up Comedy

I can’t put my finger on why, but although I love things that are funny, I don’t generally put stand-up comedy, by anyone, into that category. Maybe because it feels like you HAVE to laugh at everything, even if it’s not that funny. In any case, I’d rather stay home and watch sitcoms than go to a comedy club.

Burgers, Rice (except in sushi), Any Kind of Noodles, Coffee, Jelly, Cold Cuts…

I’m such a picky eater. I don’t like burgers (or most sandwiches with meat), cold cuts, rice when it’s not in sushi, noodles (I’ll eat pasta if there’s nothing else around, but I’m not crazy about it), bacon (ditto), jelly, coffee (always thought I’d get to like coffee when I got older- I never did), and plenty of other things. I don’t put milk on my cereal and don’t usually put salad dressing on my salad. I wish there was a convenient term to explain my weird food quirks. Vegetarian, vegan, gluten-free, lactose intolerant, allergic, dieting…people get those things. But my food issues just make me weird.

What do you like/hate that no one else does?

Wanderlust

My wanderlust is kicking in, big time.

With today being St. Patrick's Day, I feel it stronger than ever.

I have a whole list of travel goals on this blog. I've made very little progress on it, especially on those that are outside the country.

I'd never left the country until a few years ago, and that's still the only foreign place I've traveled.

I've never been to Europe.

I really want to go.

Specifically, I really want to go to England and Ireland. I mentioned it on this post I wrote at the beginning of the year.

Last night I started crying when it dawned on me how hard it might be to make that happen. It sounds so stupid- the very definition of a first-world problem- but maybe it's just a symbol of all the other things in my life I'm trying so hard to change but am having trouble with. I'm trying to find love, I'm trying to lose weight, I'm trying to get published...but so much is out of my control.

People, both in real life and in the blogosphere, always say things like, "Just get up and go! Do it while you're young! You'll regret not taking these kinds of chances when you're older!"

If only it were that simple.

If only I knew that it would be the right financial decision and that I wouldn't need to give anything else up to go.

If only I could work out the logistics of it.

If only I knew that my friends could go with me. (And I know someone is going to suggest just going by myself or on a group tour, but I don't want to do that. I like traveling by myself if I'm going someplace like New York, but to do Europe I'd only enjoy it with people I'm already close to.)

I've always been the kind of person who will regret the things she did rather than the things she didn't do. Until recently, most of my regrets were things I'd done, and I felt grateful for the risks I hadn't taken. In college, one of my friend was asked when the last time he'd taken a risk was, and he replied,"Well, I've never seen the back of a police car, so I think not taking risks is working for me." I tended to agree with him.

It's only recently that I've started to regret things I haven't done- and not seizing opportunities to travel is a major one.

For a really long time, I had no desire to see the world at all. I remember when I told a friend that, she said, "That's sad," as if there was something wrong with me. But I just didn't feel like it was an experience I needed. I was happy where I was.

But I can pinpoint the exact moment when it started to change. My friend was telling me about how a friend of hers had just come back from a semester abroad and was having trouble re-adjusting to the US, partly because it frustrated her that no one else seemed to think about how much else was out there in the world.

When I heard that story, I just thought, "Well...that's me." And just like that, I changed my mind.

It always kind of made me roll my eyes when I heard people talk about how much traveling changed them. You saw the Eiffel Tower or the Great Wall of China and suddenly you're a new person? People on online dating sites do it all the time- I talked about it here- and I still really feel like traveling is not, and should not be, some kind of badge of honor. I don't understand how a vacation could change someone that much.

But maybe I could understand it.

So much of my life, so much of what makes me different from other people, is what I haven't done rather than what I have. I feel like my lack of experiences- in love, in travel- are what make me stand out rather than what I have experienced.

In fact, maybe I'm talking about love as much as I'm talking about travel here.

Even so, I am craving someplace new to go, outside anything I've ever experienced so far.

I hope I can make it happen as soon as possible.